My good friend and brother seminarian Daniel Root just posted a good thought-provoking question on Facebook today and it did in fact make me think. His question was - "wonders why the only people who are bothered by celibacy are the ones who are not celibate?" I think one of the greatest issues with this is the fact that Celibacy is so counter to our present culture that it in a way scares people, it's not the norm, it yields no offspring, and it seems like a sad way to live - what do you mean you can't have sex for the rest of your life?!? People often ask me, don't you want to have a wife and kids? If I answered no to that question, that would be grounds for great concern. Of course I would like to have a family and kids. I have always wanted to have kids. I even had a good, healthy, generous, Catholic quota in mind - 6 kiddos! Would that have flown with my wife...eh who knows?!? hahaha! BUT, God has called me to live me life in another way and I am at great peace with that now. Just after two years of Seminary experience and training, I have come to understand a little bit better what Celibacy is and what it means for the Priestly life. Most of my attitudes about sexuality and celibacy, up to my entering the seminary, had been shaped by our secular society and by my friends. So I had to start fresh and remain ope-minded when it came to this particular idea of celibacy. I have always understood what Celibacy is, but on a very elementary level. I definitely knew about the infamous part of not having sex for the rest of your life and this is why celibacy gets such negative attention in our world. Many if not most people see celibacy as a suppression of nature and one that is tragic and unfair. Admittedly, I saw celibacy as just that while I was growing up. After furthering my knowledge of celibacy, which I have committed my self to, I have discovered the true beauty and joy of the priest's call to live a celibate life. I now understand that the true essence of celibacy goes much deeper than just the physical aspects. It became apparent that celibacy should aim for affective maturity, which in this sense, is the ability to live a true and responsible love. Celibacy is hard for most, but I know that God will never allow me to face anything that I cannot conquer or handle. If you believe in God with ALL of your heart, anything is possible through Him! With that inspiration etched into my heart, a sense of ease is brought over me concerns about celibacy and chastity invade my thoughts. I may not ever have the opportunity to be a “biological father,” but joy fills my heart none the less, because I know that through God, if it continues to be His will for me, I will be a “Spiritual Father” and be given the grace to love and serve all of my brothers and sisters, without a wife and children. I have found my true happiness in God; He will fill all voids! Celibacy is a LIFELONG process, just like Marriage is a LIFELONG process. Both are tough and both are beautiful vocations from God! Both require trust and both require God as a central player! I will reiterate, If you believe in God with ALL of your heart, anything is possible through Him!
Below is a short video about Celibacy that goes into MUCH farther depths than I could ever go into at this point in my discernment! Please watch if you are interested or in search of answers and if any of this does not suffice, I challenge you to prayerfully and proactively continue searching for the answers! God Bless!
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